Stream stuff

Crime Toys

Massage gun for my old man bones and muscles

For seasonal depression, and a cute light! Two birds, one stone.

A Michaelphone so I don't sound like I'm speaking through a cheese grater anymore.

Take this revenue split, roll it up sideways, and shove it where the sun don't shine, Amazon. Eat my whole dick.
(All donations are non-refundable)

4" cube of tungsten. For posterity
Out of stock, please do not buy this

"A wizard never low, nor is he ever zooted. He blazes precisely how he means to"
-Gandalf the Green